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mwm69
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 69
Bisexual Female, 67
UK
Forum
[/quote]
Ouch!
:bounce:
eye:
Can I give you a word of advice?? Try and be a bit less basic with your wishes Mr Thong. It may float some other peeps boats but it hasnt mine.....:wank:
:bounce:
:hunk:8)..................much sexier than watching another cock being strangled in public :thumbup:
...............well from my point of view it is. :love:
:thumbup:
:rotflmao:[/quote]
:laughabove::laughabove::laughabove::laughabove::laughabove::laughabove:Nine words women use...
1.) Fine : This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
2.) Five Minutes : If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
3.) Nothing : This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
4.) Go Ahead : This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!
5.) Loud Sigh : This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)
6.) That's Okay : This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
7.) Thanks : A woman is thanking you, do not question, or Faint. Just say you're welcome.
8.) Whatever : Is a women's way of saying fuck you!
9.) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to #3.
)[/quote]
oops...well spotted!! 
:banghead::banghead:[color="yellow"]Funkymaster[/color], [color="orange"]Funkydiva [/color]:P and [color="cyan"]Northy [/color]check into a hotel. They pay £30 to the manager and go to their room.
The manager suddenly remembers that the room rate is £25 and gives £5 to the bellboy to return to the people. On the way to the room the bellboy reasons that £5 would be difficult to share among three people so he pockets £2 and gives £1 to each person.
Now each pervert paid £10 and got back £1. So they paid £9 each, totaling £27. The bellboy has £2, totaling £29. Where is the missing £1?
:bounce:
Four SP friends were competing in the internationally renowned SP Bog Snorkelling competition.
As usual, Admin were a little careless and once again, they managed to lose the results. Luckily, a number of voyeurs were able to remember the following snippets of information:
Only one person wore the same number as the position they finished. [color="yellow"]Funkymaster[/color], who didn't wear green, beat [color="red"]Marky[/color].
[color="orange"]Funkydiva [/color] :P beat the person who wore yellow.
The person who wore number 3, wore green.
The person who wore number 2 finished first whereas [color="cyan"]Funandfunky [/color]came last.
The person who finished second wore green, [color="red"]Marky [/color]wore yellow and the person wearing red beat the person wearing blue.
So [color="yellow"]Funkymaster [/color]can you work out who finished where, the number and colour they wore?
:bounce:
[color="yellow"]Funkymaster [/color]is a keen dog admirer and over the years has had a number of dogs.
He has had an Alsatian, a Dalmatian, a Poodle and a Great Dane, but not necessarily in that order.
[color="yellow"]Funkymaster [/color]had Jamie first. The Dalmatian was an adored pet before the Great Dane. Sammy, the Alsatian, was the second dog [color="yellow"]Funkymaster [/color]loved. Whitney was housed before the Poodle and Jimmy was not a Great Dane.
Can you tell each of the dogs' name and the order in which [color="yellow"]Funkymaster [/color]had them?
:bounce:
[color="yellow"]FUNKYMASTER[/color]....Study this paragraph and all things in it. What is vitally wrong with it? Actually, nothing in it is wrong, but you must admit that it is most unusual. Don't just zip through it quickly [color="yellow"]FUNKYMASTER,[/color] but study it scrupulously. With luck you should spot what is so particular about it and all words found in it. Can you say what it is? Tax your brains and try again. Don't miss a word or a symbol. It isn't all that difficult.
Once upon a time [color="yellow"]Funkymaster [/color]went to sell his vast quantity of eggs at the local market.
When asked how many he had, he replied:
Son, I can't count past 100 but I know that.
If you divide the number of eggs by 2 there will be one egg left.
If you divide the number of eggs by 3 there will be one egg left.
If you divide the number of eggs by 4 there will be one egg left.
If you divide the number of eggs by 5 there will be one egg left.
If you divide the number of eggs by 6 there will be one egg left.
If you divide the number of eggs by 7 there will be one egg left.
If you divide the number of eggs by 8 there will be one egg left.
If you divide the number of eggs by 9 there will be one egg left.
If you divide the number of eggs by 10 there will be one egg left.
Finally. If you divide the Number of eggs by 11 there will be NO EGGS left!
How many eggs did [color="yellow"]Funkymaster [/color]have?
:bounce:
[color="yellow"]Funkymaster [/color]has 12 coins, one of which is fake!
The fake coin is indistinguishable from the rest except that it is either heavier or lighter, but you don't know which. Can you determine which is the fake coin and whether it is lighter or heavier using a balance scale and only 3 weighings?
:bounce:
There are 5 houses in 5 different colours. In each house lives a person of a different nationality. The 5 owners drink a certain type of beverage, smoke a certain brand of fag, and keep a certain pet. Using the clues below can [color="yellow"]Funkymaster[/color] determine [b]who owns the fish?[/b]
[color="yellow"]Funkymaster[/color] lives in a red house :mad:.
[color="orange"]Funkydiva[/color] :P keeps dogs as pets.
[color="violet"]Northy[/color] drinks tea 
.
The green house is on the immediate left of the white house.
The green house owner drinks coffee.
The person who smokes Pall Mall rears birds.
The owner of the yellow house smokes Dunhill.
The man living in the house right in the middle drinks milk.
[color="cyan"]Marky[/color] lives in the first house.
The man who smokes Embassy lives next door to the one who keeps cats.
The man who keeps horses lives next door to the man who smokes Dunhill.
The owner who smokes Marlborough drinks beer.
[color="white"]Seximinxi[/color] smokes No6.
[color="green"]Funandfunky[/color] lives next to the blue house.
The man who smokes Embassy has a neighbour who drinks water.
.
The green house is on the immediate left of the white house.
The green house owner drinks coffee.
The person who smokes Pall Mall rears birds.
The owner of the yellow house smokes Dunhill.
The man living in the house right in the middle drinks milk.
[color="cyan"]Marky[/color] lives in the first house.
The man who smokes Embassy lives next door to the one who keeps cats.
The man who keeps horses lives next door to the man who smokes Dunhill.
The owner who smokes Marlborough drinks beer.
[color="white"]Seximinxi[/color] smokes No6.
[color="green"]Funandfunky[/color] lives next to the blue house.
The man who smokes Embassy has a neighbour who drinks water. 