ok after reading the threads on here i have decided its time i started one for any answers that you can all come up with.
basicaly what im asking is if anyone here can come up with any idea as to why so may people are leaving the site. im sure the mods can read what the answers are and who knows mabe some of the problems/reasons can be ironed out in time.
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why are so many leaving
Sexlightened
well, for what its worth, i think the reason is to do with all the crap thats happening lately.
there's so much gossiping, back stabbing, crap stirring, jealousy issues going on that its not the sp that we all use to know and love.
i know everyone's got their own private reasons for leaving but i've spoke to a few and i know their not happy with the way things are with attitudes people seem to be having lately.
i for one, am thinking really long and hard about whether to stick around on here mainly due to the way things have been and the fact that within the last week i've took abuse off people because of either what has been said in a joke in the chatroom or because they disagree with who i'm talking to.
i never joined this site to take crap like that. i came to meet like minded people, have a laugh and a chat, and do the meets thing. i think its a shame its turned out the way it has.
anyways, thats was my opinion, so......blah to it lol
We're still pretty new to the site but I can't say we've witnessed any crap in chat. Well I haven't (Paul) but Jan uses it more than me. For us it's all still fresh and fun.
So here's my penny's worth....if there is a deal of crap flying about why don't the mods have an ability to add people to a warnined section (private to mods) Once you get 3 warnings you're out? It would need policing with checks and controls but if it helps arse holes control themselves then it can't be bad for the good people using the site....or am I missing the point?
Sex God
i agree wiv both of u, instead of us losin all the goods peeps, admin shift the bad fuckas and lets get our old fun lovin sp bak!!
im used to all the shite thrown at me and the abuse i get nearly every day but to b honest i pay my subs like any1 else, so y shud i get this abuse?.....do peeps like makin ikkle funky cry?
all i can say to u is GET A FUCKIN LIFE N LEAVE ME ALONE!!
and try and be happy before ur deaded.
..lol
funkyD xx:P 
Warming the Bed
i'm in agreement with Miss and all of you, lets just get rid of the people that cause the trouble and get this site back to the fun loving friendly place it used to be, i for one feel it's a real shame that so many of our long standing happy friendly people are feeling the need to leave us , due to what seems like the few people that take pleasure in upsetting people.
sandi xxxx
P.S now lets be honest here , this is not the scene to be into if your pron to jealousy or looking for the love of your life......but never know you might get lucky........but then you know that person is into swinging so jealousy of others can't really happen...or is that just me that thinks this way
:thumbup: well said Sandi xx. We don't usually post on these threads nowadays as there as so many of them and we'd be repeating what others have quite rightly said. However, what makes us very sad is the fact that yes, good peeps feel they have to leave because of the half wit idiots who like to wind peeps up and be nasty for the rise.
It's human nature, people can be nasty however, here we can not choose to cross the road to get away from them. As a result these people are pushing the nice ones away but..............
can't you all see it's what they want, they must be rubbing their hands with glee and thinking yaaaay there goes another, who shall we pick on next. By leaving they have won 
We honestly don't see much of the bitching and tend to keep our opinions to ourselves. If there are any people who do bitch about us and we're sure there possibly are then quite simply, we don't care, they aren't worth the bother and they would never ever push us out from here.
Please, to those who are considering leaving and are reading this, ignore them, rise above them if you leave then surely they have won what they set out to do. If you feel threatened or anyone is behaving in a intolerable way towards you, then speak to a moderator, file an abuse report the moment you have any evidence, that is the right way to do it by staying calm and believe us when we say we're speaking from experience here and that they get caught out in the end. Try not to involve others in the chatroom as the situation then gets out of hand and ends up becoming a kindergarten
Think about it peeps and stay with us.
:inlove::inlove::inlove:
ceylons mwahxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
We honestly don't see much of the bitching and tend to keep our opinions to ourselves. If there are any people who do bitch about us and we're sure there possibly are then quite simply, we don't care, they aren't worth the bother and they would never ever push us out from here.
Please, to those who are considering leaving and are reading this, ignore them, rise above them if you leave then surely they have won what they set out to do. If you feel threatened or anyone is behaving in a intolerable way towards you, then speak to a moderator, file an abuse report the moment you have any evidence, that is the right way to do it by staying calm and believe us when we say we're speaking from experience here and that they get caught out in the end. Try not to involve others in the chatroom as the situation then gets out of hand and ends up becoming a kindergarten
Think about it peeps and stay with us.
:inlove::inlove::inlove:
ceylons mwahxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 
Casanova
oh... if things were that simple then don't you all think that we would have done something about it by now???
As I will reiterate - we can only act when we are told about any trouble. The problems we are having right now is that noone tells us anything until its too late. Sometimes we get whispered by someone who needs some help/advice. We urge them to file an abuse report so that we can act... and we find-nothing. People decide not to say anything, either in case they think they're wasting time or more to the point that if its found out they have complained then the flak will come back to them.
Another problem is that alot of problems happen off-site, ie at meets, socials etc. It annoys the hell out of us that people are too clever to bring trouble on site but we cant hold jurisdiction over what happens at private meets, or m s n etc.
In short guys, we hate this situation as much as you do, we constantly look at ways that we can try and eradicate this. Sadly tho, as in life, there will always be someone with an axe to grind, someone who is never happy until they make someone feel bad. All we can do is ask you guys to start trusting us with these problems and help us to get sp back to where it was xxxxxxxxxxxxx
babyd hun if only
It appears that some people seem to think the mods on this site are only in chat to spoil peoples fun and because of this others seem to think we are unapproachable.
We do have to make sure that the chatrules are followed having said this however we are also "swingers" we like to have fun as well. Our main interest is the smooth running of the site so PLEASE inform us of these problems either by whisper in chat or through the abuse report system if we know nothing of these problems then we can't do anything so please please let us help that is what we are here to do xxxxxxxx
Orgasminator
Weve been on here over a year now and really havent witnessed any trouble... i mean theres the odd argument in chat but thats about all.
Babyd is right, most of it must go on behind the scenes, and therefor without the proper information, nothing can be done, even with information its hard when choosing between 2 conflicting opinions.
The people I have spoken to about leaving seem very varying in reasons anyway, so I'm really not sure any of it is even connected, maybe more of a coincidence??
Jo & Daz xx
:fuckinghell: I shake my head at all this, and wonder if i should even bother saying anything,
But " yes there is a but " i think i will.
We have been here around 2 years and lucky for us never realy had any great probs directed at us. the small problems we have had we have sorted our selves.
With a site like this or any other kind there will always be problems, there are to many people with there own views to not have.
like it has been said time and time again the mods are there to HELP with what they can,
if you get problems in the chat room or in ur mail then talk to them when it happenes, copy it so u can email them, it will then be up to them to look into what ever the problem is and decide from there what action can be taken.
if the problem comes from a social meet, then i would say this is out of SP control and would be down to each person to sort like you would with any problem in life.
Mods i think you do a great job, and should also be seen as normal people who are here to have fun and enjoy your selves like the rest of us.
its sinple realy..
if you have a problem with the site or someone on the site.. REPORT IT TO THE MODS OR ADMIN.
do not gosip with others about it this just causes the problem to get bigger.
If you have a problem with out side events. try to sort this your sleves, if who ever is causeing you the problem, then just ignor them.
remember nothing or no one is perfect there will always be problems in life and on websites, its how u deal with it that if indeed you need to even give it ur time of day. most of the time you will prob find u dont need to.
MO_X
:fuckinghell:
As most of you know, we havent been on the site long, so we can only speak as we find!!
So far we have been lucky, we have not had any abuse thrown at us, and we are sorry to hear that some of the nicest, genuine people on here, have, for whatever reason, no one deserves grief.
The way we look at it is, for the sado's that think they are being clever by causing trouble, the first thing you should do is ignore them and I know this is hard for some people.
Swinging does not control your everyday lifestyle, it is purely a fun hobby!! If you decide to leave (which you have the right to), it just means they win!!.
The whole point of this site, is to have fun, meet people or even just chat and make friends....if a friend of yours, or a neighbour was giving you the same abuse, what would you do?? You would either ignore them, or take action in which way you could.
All the Mods on here do a fantastic job, remember they are on here to have fun as well, if you get kicked or reported, then YOU are doing something wrong and you have to accept that and either stop it, apologise or leave.
But for all you fellow swingers out there, the Mods will help as best as they can, although they cannot control situations with txts etc.
All we can say is WELL DONE to our Mods, you have a brave job and its about time all us genuine swingers stuck together, started to have fun and bring this site back to where it once began!!
Right thats our say over and done with.........time to relax, enjoy and be friendly!!
:therethere:
i ( mr jt ) dont often post threads or even reply to them, but after chatting with a mod in the chatroom yesterday, and having a good debate on this very subject, i felt the need to reply.
will agree with mo %100, in the year we have been here we have never been singled out for abuse, never been attacked in the chatroom, we have never witnessed any bullying, nor have we felt the need to leave for any may be lucky, or we may be part of the site that get on and enjoy it here. of course there are time wasters, but i would imagine they are on any other site you choose to join that has a chatroom. i would say for every member that has something to moan about here, there are a silent majority that are happy with things. i dont really know what the answer is, but this bandwagon seems to be getting bigger. i dont mean to upset anyone here, i just want to readdress the balance a little.
mr jt xx
Genuine people are leaving at the moment due to a variety of reasons and not all of them to do with abuse.
For those of you that haven't been subjected to abuse in any way shape or form, I'm glad for you but I also know of many others who have been subjected to it and are too frightened to say anything. You may not see it openly happening in the chat room but believe me, it's happening. Others are staying put so that the idiots don't win but NEVER imagine that it is easy for them.
My reasons for leaving are my own. If I've told certain people then its because they have asked and I know and trust them and others have told me why they have thought/are thinking of leaving and I've helped them, if I can.
I have spoken to a Mod about this and raised a number of issues with them and I've also informed them why we are leaving. I [b]KNOW[/b] they do a brilliant job but it is never easy to regulate a site where there will always be a percentage of idiots, feckwits and fakes.
There are certain people on here who are trouble-makers but that will be the way with any other site in existence.
Please don't think that people who are leaving are taking the easy way out. We are not. We thought long and hard about what to do but in the end, it's best for [b]US[/b]
We are leaving due to family things, but do agree that things have definitely changed on this site in the couple of years since we have been really genuine people but too many have opinion's and follow the leaders in slagging and being a nice place to be really. Think we would of left soon if we was not anyway. x
ok first of all thanks to all the mods for offering their help and advice and i do agree with everything you say if anyone is getting abuse or greif then yes report them and would like to say thanks to you ALL fro your help and advice given to everyone on the site it cant be easy for you at all.
Also i dont think everyone is leaving because of the idiots on here but a precentage are leaving because of them. It is those people that the site doesnt need and if they are not reported or chalenged about their behavioure they will never be dealt with.
As for problems off the site then i would urge people to keep it that way off the site mabe things havnt gone your way but please dont drag it into the public arena in the chat rooms leave it wher it belongs off the site.
Sex God
i wud jus like to say, and no im not jumpin on me soap box agen.....lol:bounce:
yes iv had shit and yes iv witnessed shit in the chatroom but i think the grown-ups (sexy peeps wiv stars) do a crackin job, wen iv had any trouble be in the chatrm or nasty messages left on me profile, admin hav bin there for me!!
theyv even cum and found me in the chatroom and chatted wiv me, most the time to calm me down, 2 offer me kind words or jus to make sure im ok, half the time im cryin and they get a load of gobshite....but bless em, they still listen!!
so i can only suggest wot othas hav....if uv got a problem, report it, they aint mind readers!!
and trust me, they will look afta u!!
thanx guys.....:inlove:
ikkle moanin funkyD xx:P ok i was having a descusion last night and wondered about this as a option quite a simple one if admit could set it up and it is simply adding a block button to the chat room so that anybody who des give you hastle or abuse you simply block them and they cant message you anymore.
what do you all think about that idea and mods would that make things a bit easier for you as well id like to hear your opinion on it
Ok.. thats a good idea in theory
However:
Peeps will just change their names, come back as someone else, whinge to everyone else about it ensuring that you get a bad name and it's only one of the things that admin need to look at on this site.
I'd be for it in theory but maybe a button where the blocked people can't even see whether or not you are in the chatroom, and they certainly can't see what you type!
Although that has its problems to....
I personally think this is a progression of the site, from the older, wiser and more experienced swingers to the newer, younger and more idiotic people. It does happen, I am generalising so I'm bound to upset someone but hey...... if people choose to leave rather than ride out the multitude of problems on here at the moment, that's their perogative!
Orgasminator
There is an ignore option you can use to stop a user sending you mail, but in the chatroom, all you can do is tell admin/mods or ignore it.
I think once you been on here a while your scan reading gets really good, I know I only used to read the things I wanted to read. Now I really do try to read everything, but when the room is busy, sometimes things get missed
Jo & Daz xxx
I would really like to say something some peeps might find interesting only it will have to wait until after MK3!
Also will tell everyone I have no intention of leaving this site after my membership runs out in September only will make MK3 my last ever event(not including private meets)on this site indefinetely!!!!!
