We always hear "the rules" From the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
3. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
4. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
5. Crying is blackmail.
6. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
7. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
8. Approach us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
9. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem. See a doctor.
10. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
11. If you won't dress like the Playboy girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.
12. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
13. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of them makes you sad or angry, then we meant the other one.
14. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
15. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
16. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
17. ALL men see in only 16 colors. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
18. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
19. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle, besides we know you will bring it up again later.
20. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
21. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really.
22. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as football, the shotgun formation, or golf.
23. You have enough clothes.
24. You have too many shoes.
25. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
Post edited 03-08-2006 18:55
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THE Rules!
(No offense!)
Post edited 03-08-2006 19:14Now lets get it right
The REAL RULES
The FEMALE always makes the rules.
The rules are subject to change at any time without the MALE'S prior notification.
No MALE can possible know all the rules.
If the FEMALE suspects the MALE knows all the rules she must immediately change some or all of the rules.
The FEMALE is never wrong.
If the FEMALE Is wrong, it is due to a misunderstanding which was a direct result of something the MALE did or said wrong.
The MALE must apologise immediately for causing said misunderstanding.
The FEMALE may change her mind at any time.
The MALE must never change his mind, without the express written consent of the FEMALE.
The FEMALE has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
The MALE must remain calm at all times, unless the FEMALE wants him to be angry or upset at any time.
The FEMALE must, under no circumstances, let the MALE know whether she wants him to be angry or upset.
The MALE is expected to mind read at all times.
The FEMALE is ready when she is ready.
The MALE must be ready at all times.
Post edited 04-08-2006 13:16
Sexpert
The REAL rules............................
...... is there are no rules baby !! ...... and names are for tombstones baby hehehe - and don't forget, bones heal, chicks dig scars and America has the highest doctor to stuntman ratio in the world so ........ yeeeeeehhhh hhhhaaaaaahhhhh !!! lol 
Have fun too ..... xxxxxxx
Have fun too ..... xxxxxxx sorry we all cant be perfect with all our grammar and spellings like you Dave. Shall i just send you all my forum posts in future for you to check them for me? How would us little ladies cope in this world without the big men to put us in our place when we are wrong eh???
lol :D
Post edited 08-08-2006 21:46
:D
Post edited 08-08-2006 21:46 